As of late, I've been learning to really embrace my sensuality. for years I found myself ashamed of my body. I was pushing 200 lbs, suffering from prolonged depression, disconnected with my femininity. I grew up with the belief that my body was no bueno. As a child, I loved to be naked. I was that baby who sat on the driveway butt-ass naked. If that wasn't an indication to my mom that I would grow up being a hippie, I don't know what was. 🌻
Growing up in Catholic school, I was the thick girl. I had a booty for days and thick thighs. 🍑 I was teased and mocked and as a child, it affected my overall self-confidence. I was addicted to food and ate my emotions. Years of dealing with death and never feeling that I fit in anywhere, food was my comfort. 🍕
Fast forward to the beginning of my spiritual journey. I was starting to finally see a beacon of light. 🕯I became more conscious and aware that I am not a body and that she is here to help me and guide me. Over the years, one of my major goals was to put my health first. Other than conquering my mental illness, my priority was to transcend the suppression of my body and her image. I hid in the shadows because I was afraid and felt unworthy. I projected my insecurities on the ones I love most, hoping that they would come in and save me. 🔮 I learned the hard way that that would never work nor would that bring me genuine fulfillment.
It took time for me to embrace myself fully, yet I remained patient. As I learned to enjoy alone time and stillness, my body shifted. The introduction of yoga and meditation allowed me to tune in. 📿 I changed my eating habits and the way I spoke to my body. As a student of A Course In Miracles, I embraced radical forgiveness towards others and most importantly, me. ✌
Overall, I want you to know, it's never too late to love yourself fully and unconditionally. Up until now, I'm down almost 55 pounds. 👍🏽 As I've learned to take back my power and to find approval within, my whole perspective and life has shift. 👁 I welcome you to embrace your feminine side and be more gentle and kind to yourself. 💫